Today, we are concluding the series How I make my Marriage great, which was initiated with 4 Ways I Make My Marriage Amazing! Heidi from Grow Family Love is closing us out with amazing advice I was blessed to meet Heidi on a Facebook group and we immediately connected. She was shy at first about guest posting at first, but thankfully she said yes. I have to agree with her Marriage is Amazing!
I’ve been married to my soul mate for 17 years. We were married after just 3 short months of dating, when I was only 19 years old! I’ve learned a lot over the years. Our best secret – Marry someone who makes you fall in love with God every single day! I lost my mother at a very young age, but have been very blessed with many Titus 2 women along the way. Here are some of the most important things I’ve learned about marriage so far.
I’m committed to my husband and my marriage.
Marriage has ups and downs, just as life has ups and downs. The best thing about this is everything in marriage is amplified, especially the good. Marriage is not easy or for the faint of heart. Most people go into marriage thinking happily ever after. Happiness is not the most important thing in life. Happiness comes and goes. Feelings aren’t dependable, either. True love is defined by making the decision to be together no matter what life throws your way.
We’ve faced some pretty big trials over the years. We’ve faced major surgeries for both of us, job loss, the loss of parents, and even the loss of a child. We’ve also faced blessings in our life that have been challenging, too, such as the birth of our children, starting businesses together with the possibility of losing them because of other people. One thing has always stayed the same. We’ve always remained committed to each other through it all – no matter what.
I love talking to and spending time with my husband.
The first thing I ever experienced from my husband was his voice. We talked for hours before ever meeting in person. I still love talking with my husband every day, even about the things I’m not interested in. As his wife, my job is to care for him, love him, and share his happiness.
We talk about our dreams, even if we never attain them. Sharing our goals, we talk about what we want for today, tomorrow, and the rest of our lives. We talk about our children and our dreams for them, and our plans for the future. Even when it’s hard to hear, we continually share our hearts with one another. I love to spend time with my husband doing anything and everything.
He’s my very best friend. I love to work with him, watch him work on cars, cook food with him, enjoy food with him, keep him company working on projects, and just hang out with him and our children.
I tell my husband thank you for the little things.
Of course, I thank my husband for the big things he does. More importantly, I notice the little, everyday things he does. Thanking him when he cooks a meal for the two of us or our whole family. I thank him for taking care of the kids and letting me sleep in. Thanking him for working hard for our family. I thank him for loving me, even when I don’t deserve it.
We’re patient and forgiving with one another.
We’re two imperfect people in an imperfect world. We both make mistakes, sometimes very large ones that have hurt one another deeply. One of the most important things, we’ve both learned is to be patient and forgiving with one another.
We love each other in spite of our faults.
When I met my husband, he smoked cigarettes. This is something I absolutely hated! Fortunately, it was something he hated, too. It was a bad habit/addiction he had formed before he met me. My husband would always tell me while having a cigarette, how badly he wanted to quit and how much he hated cigarettes knowing they may be killing him.
It was the times when he hadn’t had a cigarette in awhile he would say they were keeping him alive by killing the stress of daily life. Eventually, my husband would win the battle over nicotine. This was many answered prayers for me and for him. I watched my husband battle the nicotine drug, which was one of the hardest battles I’ve seen him face in our marriage. This experience taught me the simple concept, you always want what you do not have.
Marriages are very much the same as addictions. It is very easy to say you can do without the love of your spouse when you have them all the time. But if you were to lose your spouse, you would do anything to have them back. You always want you can’t have, whether it’s good for you or not. Each spouse needs to love each other in spite of their faults, recognizing that the absence of each other is far worse. In marriage, it’s best to focus on the positive things about our spouse.
Marriage is the most amazing relationship and holds the family together!
Marriage is awesome and hard! It is a blessing. I’ve become a person I never would have become on my own. I’m a better person because of my husband. My husband is a better person because of me. We’re better together. We’re able to do awesome things together that we could never do apart.
The best thing my husband has ever given me (besides himself) is our beautiful children. They are the one flesh of our love that the Bible talks about it. Marriage is good for husbands, wives and children, too! If you put God at the front of it all, marriage is amazing, even though you have to work at it!
Wives, keep loving your husbands! God sees everything you do for him and hears every prayer. I want families to love each other – with all their heart, soul, and might! With God and a strong family that sticks together, you can overcome anything!
Heidi (aka Mrs. Olsen) is happily married to her soul mate, a mother of many (including an angel in heaven), a homeschool teacher, a business owner, a realtor, and a writer. She started her blog to share God’s many blessings in her life. Heidi wanted to share what she’s learned on this journey called life. She loves to grow all kinds of things, including babies, plants, and businesses – most importantly LOVE.
Heidi blogs at Grow Family Love where she shares her experiences of learning to grow family love in many different ways. You can also find her family on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest, and Google. Blessings and love from her family to yours! ❤
These are her favorite posts she’s written about marriage on her blog so far –